Saturday 25 August 2007
Backstory
Chapter 1.
One day there lived a very naughty little boy. His name was Andy. His parents had realised at an early age that he was trouble. No matter how mcuh they tried.
Andy prided himself on his record. 15 times in and out of Juvy by the time he was 15. Despairing, his parents turned to electro-shock therapy - 3 sessions a week. It did nothing but aggravate his passion for petty crime. He stole chocolate from the IGA, wrote "Math sucks" on the school desks, glued two 5 cent pieces together in order to trick the vending machine into thinking it was 2 dollars, and worst of all.... an unhealthy passion for Baroque music.
Chapter 2.
Over the years Andy went from bad to worse. He had to change his naughty ways for good, or else become a delinquent forever. (pause for effect) Then one day he framed the pure hearted Robbie in a vicious waterfight, resulting in a detention for the both of them.
THen detention remained a permanent mark on Robbie's record. He was expelled, and after a few months discovered Islamic extremism, joining the Jihad. Jealous of Andy's impressive record concerning theft from teh IGA, Robbie decided to do Andy one better - he blew up the IGA and the surrounding buildings.
ASIO had been following RObbie's movements for a while. They caught him in a seedy bar betting on a cockfight. He was shipped immediately to Guantanamo Bay.
3 years later, images were leaked to the press of prison abuse cases. Butt-naked on the top of a pyramid, surround by several snarling Alsations, was none other than Robbie Elisabeth James. While the Australian Governement will not help or accept him, he has applied for citizenship in several other countries. None of them will accept such a hardened criminal.
Chapter 3.
Just for the sake of mentioning the fat kid.
Andy stares longingly out of his maximum security cell like a fat kid looks at chocoalte cake. He's not really hungry, it's just habitual now.
Alternitively - like a fat kid stares at another fat kid, because you are what you eat.
LIke a fat kid stares at Kirsty Alley before and after Jenny Craig.
LIke a fat kid stares at a double burger with cheese... it's a gland problem.
Like a fat id stares at pistacio nuts (don't laught at that, it's really not funny).
One day there lived a very naughty little boy. His name was Andy. His parents had realised at an early age that he was trouble. No matter how mcuh they tried.
Andy prided himself on his record. 15 times in and out of Juvy by the time he was 15. Despairing, his parents turned to electro-shock therapy - 3 sessions a week. It did nothing but aggravate his passion for petty crime. He stole chocolate from the IGA, wrote "Math sucks" on the school desks, glued two 5 cent pieces together in order to trick the vending machine into thinking it was 2 dollars, and worst of all.... an unhealthy passion for Baroque music.
Chapter 2.
Over the years Andy went from bad to worse. He had to change his naughty ways for good, or else become a delinquent forever. (pause for effect) Then one day he framed the pure hearted Robbie in a vicious waterfight, resulting in a detention for the both of them.
THen detention remained a permanent mark on Robbie's record. He was expelled, and after a few months discovered Islamic extremism, joining the Jihad. Jealous of Andy's impressive record concerning theft from teh IGA, Robbie decided to do Andy one better - he blew up the IGA and the surrounding buildings.
ASIO had been following RObbie's movements for a while. They caught him in a seedy bar betting on a cockfight. He was shipped immediately to Guantanamo Bay.
3 years later, images were leaked to the press of prison abuse cases. Butt-naked on the top of a pyramid, surround by several snarling Alsations, was none other than Robbie Elisabeth James. While the Australian Governement will not help or accept him, he has applied for citizenship in several other countries. None of them will accept such a hardened criminal.
Chapter 3.
Just for the sake of mentioning the fat kid.
Andy stares longingly out of his maximum security cell like a fat kid looks at chocoalte cake. He's not really hungry, it's just habitual now.
Alternitively - like a fat kid stares at another fat kid, because you are what you eat.
LIke a fat kid stares at Kirsty Alley before and after Jenny Craig.
LIke a fat kid stares at a double burger with cheese... it's a gland problem.
Like a fat id stares at pistacio nuts (don't laught at that, it's really not funny).
# posted by Orange Week @ 4:41 pm 
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